Thursday, 23 January 2014

mini rant about stuff no one cares about.

So, I'm an artist... all my clothing is covered in art crap ranging from paint to clay stains to pigment... lets just so i don't own a lot of nice outfits cause i will just end ruining them and that makes me sad.

So when i got offered this job i thought. "great, it doesn't start for a while... that'll give me a week to get nice clothing and probably a haircut" cause i knew the job, while it didn't have a dress code we are expected to look nice.

then a lot of things happened... i was forced to take a course on shit i already knew... then immediately after i finished the test i was asked to come in the next day.

so again.... i have decent clothing but nothing super fancy cause more likely then not i will get india ink all over it...
so my first reaction is a long line of swearing but then i was like. "you know... she has been warned that i'm not terribly worried about fashion and she has given me less then no time to get new clothes... it's just for a few days and i can go shopping on the weekend..." i can't really go shopping after work cause... well the days are long and i only really have enough time to eat, get ready for the next day and sleep.

but dammit... i'm wearing the nicest non-paint covered outfits i own and i still feel like i'm being judged on how i'm dressed.

and this wouldn't bother but me if the clothing was like scummy crap but no... i'm dressed nicer then some other people.... but still my boss wants me to dress nicer.
and it wouldn't bug me so much if EVERYONE was heald to this standard... but (and i'm not saying it's sexist but it kinda sorta is) it is more expected of the women.
we are expected to look nice as we work... we are expected to eat healthy hippy dippy crap that has no damn flavor... and i'm sorry but thats not me... and i hate that they are forcing it on me. my normal wardrobe of babydoll shirts and dark jeans is not terrible... it's clean and 99% of the time i have a nice sweater on.... but it's not 'stylish' and it's like... news flash i am not stylish.... because stylish is bloody expensive and i can't justify that amount of money for a damn near see through shirt which i have to layer with a camisol which i will be pullign down all day cause i hate when shirts ride up. and the style i like would label me a weirdo cause... i like my puffy frilly girly girl crap.
Meanwhile - everyone else can wear t-shirt and jeans and hoodies and no one bats a damn eye.

i'm just missing my old job... it was the same as this one just in a different atmosphere and it was a lot more fun... people would smile more and there was always laughter and noise even when it was crunch time.
it's so quiet there... and everyone is so serious and just... ugh... never taking that kind of job again... i like my old style much better and hope to continue that... or maybe a different industry is in order...
the job itself is fine, it's a lot of stuff i was doing before and my supervisor gives me a lot of freedom to do things in a way i'm comfortable [and he obviously doesn't care how i dress but he doesn't get the last say]... but i am tried of the bullshit side.. as long as i'm not dressed like a slob and i'm doing a good job i fail to see what the issue is.

and who knows... i could be reading way too much into their looks... i'm a bit odd and quiet and maybe thats throwing them off... i don't know... i just don't want to change who i am for a few months simply cause they are paying me... 


  1. It's not like you have to change who you are - you simply have to make a new side of yourself. It's Persona's teaching (as well as the reason I love that series :D)

    1. yep and i'm sure eventually they'll accept my 'sense of style' cause this is a temporary job and i wanna be able to wear all my clothes while i'm working on art without having a cry when i ruin them. (read as i'll dress nice but it's still going to be cheap cause... clothing costs to much)