Frustraiting.

so, just finished my second week of work and yeah... i'm a little worried. (also there will be typos for reason that will be explained shortly)

so a long time ago i sustained a shoulder injury at work, it should have been something simple but that injury forced me to take off work for 4 months and see physio 3 times a week cause i had no use of my right (dominant) arm. as the years went on the pain would come and go and after countless tests and many visits with many doctors i was always told the same thing. "well we know something is wrong, we just can't pinpoint what. try to avoid getting to the point where you can't use you arm anymore... as long as you try to maintain it it shouldn't get too much worse."
yeah that was.... 7 or 8 years ago.

so for the past year my shoulder has barely hurt, sometimes if i work on to much art and not enough breaks i'll get a little sore but a few days of rest and i'm back to normal. 

Now this job is similar to ones i've done in the past but since i'm in a different deparment theres a lot more volume then there was before. and we are in the slow portion (though thats going to change) so the first week i had to do this extremely repetitive activity around 400 times over the course of a day i was really sore cause it had been a year since i had to do that kind of stuff.
then when i had to do it again this week (and it was slightly more) i pushed my shoulder to the point where i'm about to lose the ability to use it.
So i'm on edge cause i already was anxious about doing this job but now that i'm at a point where i will not be able to process this thing in time and i'll be needing to do double or triple the amount i'm doing currently... and it hits me.
"I can't do this job"
i've been there 2 weeks.... and i'm thinking of quitting despite getting passed about a week long anxeity attack where i was a mess all day by the mear thought of accepting the job... now i have accepted it and i'm going to fail?
but i just can't see any other option, i know if i push my arm even just a little further i will not be able to use it for months... which means not only can i not work but i also can't take commissions... i will have no way of earning income for a chunk of time.
and so when i tell my family member and bosses that i do not think i can do this job what do they say?
"oh we'll work it out"
"oh you can go to the message therapyst right now and it should help"
"we don't want you to quit"
"we don't want to hire someone else we like you"

and thats really and i'm flattered that after only a few weeks they think i work hard but i know the longer we push this off the more i'm going to end up screwing them over when i break... and i do not want that.

"we'll get you to do different activities"
a) i don't want special treatment
b) even if i switch to using my left hand as dimoniant as i can get it it still hurts my right arm cause the problem stems from my neck and back.

"we'll give you more computer work"
again, if i move my upper back at all it hurts... so thank you for the thought but i can't see it helping.

"here try this medicine!"
it's cause by my spine being out of alignment and a nerve in my neck being pinched... no amount of medicine can fix that. 

the massage therapyst at least gave me some things i can do to try and help but i have 1 week to make a full recovery and i know that is impossible. when i'm to this point of pain i tend to need a good month or so of healing and physio. and if i try to do the thing that injured me while still injured i'm just going to make it worse.
i'm begging these people to replace me and they have outright said "no, not yet" and i'm just so frustrated.
I do not want to quit.
but i also don't want to break myself for a job i had doubts about taking.
and i don't want to be broken at a time where they need me at my best... there are deadlines and timeframes that need to be met or we get fined... and i was hired specifically to do this job.
i seriously hope that if this doesn't get better (which i just can't see... i've been at this point so many times and i know the long recovery i have ahead of me) that they hire someone quickly cause i don't want to saddle the person i was helping with doing that job as well.

but i'm getting so sick and tired of people saying they don't want to think about me leaving cause i fit in well... i like them all so much but i know whats best for my body... and i know what needs to be done and no one will listen. i'm flattered but i'm sorry.... i just can't do this anymore.
i'm so sick of this constant pain and now it's coming on so quickly and no one is able to fix it... the best they can do is put a little bandaid on and hope it sticks

Completed: Howl's Moving Castle (Novel/spoilers)

Story time:
Way back in.... whatever year the fi;m version of howls moving castle came out, a friend of me asked if i wanted to go check it out.
I had never heard of it but i figured why not.

and in the end i really enjoyed it, i seem to be one of a few who liked that movie... it's not perfect by any means and from the stairs scene to just before the end it gets a little stupid and the pacing grinds to a halt... but the ending is utterly adorable and i love the character arc. Also the animation and music are really well done but thats to be expected from studio Ghibli.

Now... i am going to have to spoil both the book and the film in order to talk about this cause i can't talk about what i like without spoilers.

So recently i was at a different friends house and i notice she had the novel on her bed. I thought to myself "i have nothing to read on my kindle right now... it's probably not expensive" so i asked her if it was any good and when she said it was enjoyable i ordered a copy for myself.

However when i opened the book and read the first line i was worried. i am having a hard time describing the feeling it gave me but it was almost like it was trying to be the most whimsical thing you have ever seen. now for a fairy tale that's not a terrible thing, at first it was feeling like it was trying WAY too hard. However once i got used to the "sing songy" structure of storytelling i grew to accept it and by the end i enjoyed it.

So is the book different from the film?
to a point.... no. The first chuck is pretty much exactly the same except we have two sisters instead of one.

essentially Sophie bumps into howl in town (though the books encounter is much much shorter) goes to see her sister and then when she heads back to the hat shop the witch of the waste turns her old for 'some reason'. Sophie, who doesn't want to frighten her family, runs away before they see her as a 90 year old woman.  Then she comes across the moving castle and bullies her way on board.

so yeah... pretty much identical in both however at this point there is already one massive difference. The turnip headed scarecrow does not stay with her in the moving castle at all. he does re-appear late in the story but for the most part he is not there.

now i can understand doing things in a different order because film is a much shorter and less inside someones head type of medium... but even knowing that i was perplexed for a long time why such a key character was missing from the source material.... yes i felt in the film his resolution was rushed and pretty stupid but still.... i wondered how they were going to accomplish certain things if he wasn't there.
but as i mentioned that was when i thought the stories were fairly similar.... pretty much after that point there was a drastic change.

Again, pretty major spoilers so... yeah
So in the film the second half of the film focuses on the witch who has lost her power, the war and how howl is going to have to fight it, howls true form and how to break sophies curse.
yeah..... none of that, except the curse breaking though it's more focused on howl then sophie, happens in the book.
there is a war that is spoken about but it is not a plot element. Howl is not a bird, he is from wales... we never really hear about how he gets to this land film with magic but who cares... he's from another time and place. the witch does not lose her powers... in fact the witch it the catalyst for the climax.

now... that seems like a pretty massive change... when you take the main antagonist and the cause of everyone's suffering and turn her into a weak old woman simply so you can have the main antagonist be war.... yeah this actually kind of pissed me off. I always felt the "and now howl must fight war cause of reasons" was rushed, unexplained and just silly... it threw off the pacing of the film completely... so to learn that it was never a part of the story.... yeah, not cool ghibli.

the Actual climax is, as i mentioned, the wicth has put a curse on howl as well and it's so that she can steal his heart and create the perfect man to be king and she would be his bride. Sophie, who is also a witch though only recently found out, does everything in her power to try and save howl from it even if it puts herself at risk. she goes to break calcifers contract with howl but worries it'll kill him. however her magic is special and she's probably the only one who can have them both survive.

After giving howl back his heart calcifer is free and sophies curse is broken as well (or at least partially, we are in her head most of the time so when she mentions that she seems a chunk of her auburn hair but ignores it i figure thats when the curse broke but there is no fanfare so it could have broken slightly earlier or later) Howl defeats the final form of the witch and then the rest of her curses are broken and howl goes back to the arrogant guy he was before but you can still tell he cares deeply for sophie and the feeling is returned.

Now i mention this as just kind of popping up but no... it is steadily built over time as her respecting him, her being curious, her being jealous and then finally admitting to herself that she does have feelings for him despite looking like and old lady.

oh and calcifer comes back with the proviso that he can leave at any time to go exploring since he has been tied to that fireplace for so long.

then the book does something i think was handled better in the film. Hwls hair is still unnaturally blond and sohpies hair is back to 'red gold' as she called it.
i liked that in the film her hair ended up silver and his was dark... if hers had gone back to normal nad his had gone natural as well i would have been okay with it but yeah... that was one aspect i thougth was sweeter in the film.

Spoilers end

I really enjoyed this book, i don't think i'll read the next one "castle in the air" (which has nothing to do with castle in the sky) for a while cause i have a huge backlog of fantasy novels that have been recommended to me. still i am glad i took the time to read this, it's not very long [makes sense as it is technically a childrens book] and even though it's got whimsy at every turn it never feels pretentious.
also if you haven't seen the Film by Studio Ghibli go see it, it may not be your cup of tea but i still think it's enjoyable.

Howl's moving castle is written by Diana Wynn Jones and you can get it in a variety of ways but i got it as an ebook
also despite my spilers i skimmed a lot of details so yeah... go read it!

mini rant about stuff no one cares about.

So, I'm an artist... all my clothing is covered in art crap ranging from paint to clay stains to pigment... lets just so i don't own a lot of nice outfits cause i will just end ruining them and that makes me sad.

So when i got offered this job i thought. "great, it doesn't start for a while... that'll give me a week to get nice clothing and probably a haircut" cause i knew the job, while it didn't have a dress code we are expected to look nice.

then a lot of things happened... i was forced to take a course on shit i already knew... then immediately after i finished the test i was asked to come in the next day.

so again.... i have decent clothing but nothing super fancy cause more likely then not i will get india ink all over it...
so my first reaction is a long line of swearing but then i was like. "you know... she has been warned that i'm not terribly worried about fashion and she has given me less then no time to get new clothes... it's just for a few days and i can go shopping on the weekend..." i can't really go shopping after work cause... well the days are long and i only really have enough time to eat, get ready for the next day and sleep.

but dammit... i'm wearing the nicest non-paint covered outfits i own and i still feel like i'm being judged on how i'm dressed.

and this wouldn't bother but me if the clothing was like scummy crap but no... i'm dressed nicer then some other people.... but still my boss wants me to dress nicer.
and it wouldn't bug me so much if EVERYONE was heald to this standard... but (and i'm not saying it's sexist but it kinda sorta is) it is more expected of the women.
we are expected to look nice as we work... we are expected to eat healthy hippy dippy crap that has no damn flavor... and i'm sorry but thats not me... and i hate that they are forcing it on me. my normal wardrobe of babydoll shirts and dark jeans is not terrible... it's clean and 99% of the time i have a nice sweater on.... but it's not 'stylish' and it's like... news flash i am not stylish.... because stylish is bloody expensive and i can't justify that amount of money for a damn near see through shirt which i have to layer with a camisol which i will be pullign down all day cause i hate when shirts ride up. and the style i like would label me a weirdo cause... i like my puffy frilly girly girl crap.
Meanwhile - everyone else can wear t-shirt and jeans and hoodies and no one bats a damn eye.

i'm just missing my old job... it was the same as this one just in a different atmosphere and it was a lot more fun... people would smile more and there was always laughter and noise even when it was crunch time.
it's so quiet there... and everyone is so serious and just... ugh... never taking that kind of job again... i like my old style much better and hope to continue that... or maybe a different industry is in order...
the job itself is fine, it's a lot of stuff i was doing before and my supervisor gives me a lot of freedom to do things in a way i'm comfortable [and he obviously doesn't care how i dress but he doesn't get the last say]... but i am tried of the bullshit side.. as long as i'm not dressed like a slob and i'm doing a good job i fail to see what the issue is.

and who knows... i could be reading way too much into their looks... i'm a bit odd and quiet and maybe thats throwing them off... i don't know... i just don't want to change who i am for a few months simply cause they are paying me... 

New Job

So, today was interesting.

Long story short i had to take a class today for work, it was all stuff i knew and had done but this was mandatory so i went in, took the class, did the test and then on my way home i get asked if i can come in tomorrow.

I still don't know for sure if i passed (i would be surprised if i failed) but yeah... i will gladly come into work tomorrow.

So what does this mean?
Well.... see you in a few months.

okay not really... but I will be limited on what i can talk about cause i'll be under an NDA... so if i answer evasively.... yeah it's cause i don't have a choice.
I will still be making art and trying to do more process work bits.... i will actually be reading more cause if i ever have to transit i may as well be doing something with my time and i'm not fond of drawing while moving and i don't wanna lug a game console around on the off chance i'll have an hour to play it.
I will still be watching all that anime but i may fall behind and give up on more titles. if there are any titles you want me to keep trying that i may have fallen behind on just let me know.

I can't see making time for games and probably not movies... the days are just too long... so yeah those will stop for a while.

So essentially more of one thing... less of other things... but i'll still be here and trying to check this daily... i may just take longer to update or reply.

so yeah... it's not going to be for long, just a few months... then back to unemployment (unless something else shows up)

Completed: Iron Man 3

I didn't really care for it.
Granted... i am currently in a lot of pain as my back for no reason decided to seize up on me so yeah... i'm a little negative.

but in my pain riddled state i just felt it was kinda dull.
Everything was brought up and resolved with such ease.
there was no plot twist you didn't see coming from a mile away.
and the ending was really dumb.
it should have been called "one liners 3"... sure they all could be called that but this felt like it was trying really really hard.

granted some moments were funny... but never engaging.

But again, i'm more then a little biased since i'm just hoping the pain killers kick in soon and i can stop crying out in pain every time i move a little.

I want to say i like the first two... and i mean... i remember the first one being really fun.... but i don't remember a damn thing from either of them EXCEPT the robot that keeps screwing up.
everything else is a bit of a haze so yeah... i guess i didn't like it that much.

but yeah... iron man three isn't bad... it's just really dull... i'm sad to hear that RDJ isn't doing the roll anymore but honestly i get it.... i'm sure he had his fun but 4 films as one character can be taxing and everyone wants to try new things. He and the rest of the cast did a wonderful job as actors... but something is lacking and i'm not sure if it's the script or the directing but it just felt like it needed something to make it more cohesive.

i could probably be more insightful then that but no... too much pain...

So anipan is dead? edited

Long story short: The first thing i ever supported through crowd funding was a website for artist...  i felt it may be a good switch from DeviantArt because i'm finding the community from DeviantArt isn't giving me what i want.... so new site with the feature to support larger art pieces... sounds interesting.

I don't remember how much i gave... it wasn't a lot... but still i gave them money so i hoped it would be good.

Well... i don't know why i was thinking it would be better...

1st. they released the site to the public way before it was ready... after the campaign ended the announced that it would only take a few months which should have been a big red flag but at that point... they already had my money...
anyways the layout was okay, the front page was cluttered but hey.. it was a Alpha/Beta testing grounds.
viewing the artwork was very nice and having your account be determined by number meant you could make anything your user name... this was a feature i found very nice even if i never used it.
however, as all art sites end up, the only art that showed up on the front page was the popular stuff and there was no way to change it.

2nd. in the alpha/beta stages there was no real inbox or way to reply to people that made sense.... when they released the site to the public this was never fixed... for a community based website you NEED a way to communicate.... so yeah when this was still a problem 6 month and even a year after it 'launched' ... yeah another red flag.

3rd. Because it was made by the people who did mangabullet (another dead website though it died abotu a year after Anipan released) people thought it would be a site focusing on Anime-inspired art and when people of all art stiles started posting the entitled a-holes pretty much lost their shit... going as far as to ask that things like photography and literature be banned as it wasn't anime... despite the site never being called and anime only site.

4th. it took ages to load anything... sure it's nice to get details of large picks but 9/10 times it would time out.

5th. submitting to the site was a pain and half the time wouldn't work properly.

6th. never updated and now i think it's good to consider it dead.... everyone who gave them money was essentially ripped off and if you ever see another site being made by Eddz well just don't give them money, i'm not saying don't use the site just... yeah be careful about financing them.

Honestly, i would not be surprised if this was all a scam to start with, they had a thing where you could buy shares of the website (i don't remember if it was MB or AP but both are dead so the point stands) and the thinking being eventually it would be worth something? yeah... wouldn't be surprised if that was just an attempt to get more money before running cause it was implemented fairly late in whichever sites lifespan.

It also seems like a new site Inkr is poping up with a lot of similarities to MB and AP... yeah i hope no one gives it money, at least not until it has proven to be a stable site that wont vanish overnight... i don't know for sure if it's the same people but the locations match and more important the design aesthetics match.

but yeah this was something we could all see from a mile away and do nothing to stop it. This is why everything on crowdfunding sites is buyer beware... i would love to see some legal action against the creators but honestly i doubt a case would hold any water (the best i can hope is if they make another site that no one gives them money). they said they would make a site called anipan... and they did, it was nothing like they promised but thats tough shit.

edit: on Jan 20th they finally came out with a story on what happened, this does not mean i am okay with what happened. I am still annoyed about backing an ultimately failed project but hey...  it happens. 
long story short - unexpected stuff happened and eventually they ran out of money, the site was already such a failure there was no point it putting more money into it... i get it... still you can't blame people for considering it's a scam when not only does everyone involved go silent but another similar site starts showing signs of coming out.

oh well... eventually i'll find a different site to use instead of DA.
I don't hate DA but it does a few things that really piss me off... mostly it's stance on copyright... but also the community feels very entitled to have things their way, most of them are just too young to realize the world doesn't revolve around you.... and one word comments that honestly mean nothing and do nothing to help people grow... i just want a more creative space i guess... but i'll keep posting there till i get off my ass and code a personal website (*shudder*) but knowing me... it'll take forever so... yeah... DA is good enough for now... at least i don't feel cheated by them.

also this is not news... it apparently vanished some time in november... i just checked it today and i even remember a friend mentioning it was down a while back... but yeah... it's January now and still no news... so yeah it's dead
do not support Inkr financially until they are stable and working and a good community, it is his new site.
probably best to just avoid... too much headache

30 questions about video games from tumblr

so i was strolling around around on tumblr and came across an "ask me" list about video games.

So i was all... Sounds good.
but i figure... no one is going to ask... and i wanna answer every question so....

30 questions about Video games! from Tumblr

1:Do you try to stay away from walkthroughs? 

I always try to stay away from them but there are times where i just have no idea what I'm supposed to do next and i will check walkthroughs as a way of getting a hint.  the only time i will outright consult them is if there is a game with multiple endings and theres an ending i want to get... but even then i usually play through walkthrough-less first and then i go back.

2:Company you're always loyal to? 

I think being outright loyal to a company is a dangerous mindset. Even good developers are capable of putting out a less then stellar product. and you also get people fighting about which company is better and in the end it divides the community.

That being said, when i see game with Either The Atlus or Falcom logo on them i am more willing to give them a try so i guess I'm loyal to them... however i don't think either company has produced only perfect gems descended from the heavens so i am cautious but still 'loyal'

3:Best game you've ever played? 

Hm... can anyone really answer this question? i mean i can list of some games i really like but i don't think i can pick one as being the best I've ever played... so I'll just say it's probably either Ys 3/7/4/origin, Avalon code, Disgaea, 9 hours 9 persons 9 doors, Tales or phantasia or Radiant Historia... all these games have things in them that i consider great but i can't pick a best game among them cause they all have flaws as well.

4:Worst game you've ever played? 

I try to avoid bad games.... but i still have a list for this.

Rhythm Thief - a Rhythm game that lacks a few any good songs, consistent gameplay, consistent time measures, readability and above all that is just a prof. layton ripoff without realising whats fun about layton.

Hoshigami Remix - just an outright broken and damn near unplayable game all compounded by a lacklustre story and cheating AI. I didn't get very far in the game before i tried to return it and the cashier informed me i may as well keep it cause i would only get 1 cent back from it. 

so it shits on my shelf gathering dust never to be played again. 

A Witch's Tale - when i get mad at games i tend to throw whatever I'm holding into something soft to vent my frustration... i always have a pillow handy and i never throw hard... it's more of a "get this away from me before i actually break it" kind of toss. 

this game made me throw my ds into my bed a few times but the time i remember most was during this underwater world section... this game has the dreaded 'underwater timer' which i loath in any game but in this game it's particularly insulting because the main character is really hard to control thanks to her movement being determined by the touch pad.
so after getting stuck for the millionth time i said screw it and looked up a walkthrough cause i obviously wasn't doing it right (i was it was just broken) and then when i saw two things that made me cringe.
1. How to get True end
2. 1st playthrough is just a dream and you have to replay the game to get true ending.
well that game was out of my system so fast cause i wasn't going to play something i had to play again to get the real ending.

L'Ark Rise Fantasia - one time i was in transit and someone was talking to me about games and this game came up... I hate this game... the person liked it a lot and the look on his face of "awww but i enjoy it" made me feel bad... but then i explained why i hate it.
The voice acting is the worst i've ever seen

I was going to put a vid of the opening scene there but no... this video captures the terrible voice acting so much better.
The gameplay is non existent and completely plays itself... it has a needlessly complex battle system with an auto button and yeah.... you are going to be hitting the auto button constantly.
and then they story is just okay... it's not the worst story I've ever seen but it's nothing we haven't seen before.
but yeah Ryfia's (purple haired girl in white) voice acting is probably the single worst i have ever heard in anything ever...

5:A popular series/game you just can't get into no matter how much you try? 

Dangerous question... okay.

Legend of zelda - I love the art and the story but the gameplay actually makes me really really angry... it isn't fun for me so i just can't get into the series as a whole.

Final Fantasy series - I have played a little bit of every FF game except 8, 9, the early tactics games and the online games and no matter what i just never end up beating them. I like them to a point but then one of two things happen... It becomes a grind fest in order to beat the game or goes into space.... or both. 

I hate Grinding... i think the concept of it is flawed, I think that you should be able to beat a game playing through it as normal without worrying about side quests and still be able to beat the final boss... it should be hard as hell but do-able.

Sidequesting should allow the fight to be easier... but in the end side quests should be optional. But final fantasy games seem to feel that if you don't spend hours getting your level/grids as high as possible you simply are not playing it correctly.  so in the end the game that at one point was fun become a boring grind fest as i look around trying to find crap i missed and it always ends in me putting the game down indefinitely. Or it worse it ends with me gaining a level, saving, trying the boss, failing and then repeating till i win and that just isn't fun to me.

To date i have only ever beaten the tactics games on DS and 10... and 10 is a technicality cause my game froze after i beat the final boss (guess my system though that terrible boss was a joke and decided to become the final boss)

I did get to the final boss in 7 but... well.... you know that attack he does? the one with the really long cut scene? yeah... first time i encountered that i jumped up and turned off my system to avoid panic attack... the second time i just left the room listening for the attack to finish and when i got back my party was dead cause my level wasn't high enough so i said.... screw it i can look up the ending. 

I don't think the Final fantasy games are bad and i can get into them easily enough... i didn't even hate what i played of 13 (though when our system red ringed and i wasn't about to replay that) but i just find it hits a point where the fun stops and while not every game needs to be fun i do feel games need to be enjoyable.

6:A game that's changed you the most? 

The most.... hm... I'm going to have to go with Tales of Phantasia.

it was the first game i ever did everything in... got every secret, every summon every spell and nearly maxed out every character. I loved the story i loved the use of comedy and i loved the somewhat action based game play. it also helped me feel confident enough to try other niche games i had never heard of since as i mentioned before... the most popular RPGs out there just weren't doing it for me. 

7:A game you'll never forget? 

that's tough cause from n64 onward i haven't really forgotten any of the games I've played... so i guess I'll go with what game i tend to think off from time to time despite how much time has passed... which would be avalon code. I bought the game brand new for 10 bucks on a whim and despite some buggy aspects i really really loved it... not to mention the art is stunning. but yeah fun game and now I'm good at slider puzzles.

8:Best soundtrack? 

Ha ha ha... oh boy... i can't pick a best overall so I'll just say Ys 3,4,7 and Origins and Radiant Historia... and i guess wind waker... i may not love the game but that score is simply lovely. 

9:A game you turn your volume off every time you play it? 

L'ark rise fantasia but more so for the voice acting... from what i remember the music is just kinda mediocre. 

10:A game you've completely given up on? 

See answers for #4 and #5

11:Hardest game you've played? 

I'm not a fan of 'hard' games... i just like enjoying the experience and stressing out isn't fun... so i guess Ys Origin on hard with Hugo. I am playing ys4 right now on nightmare but i doubt I'll beat it so I'm not counting it. 

12:Shortest time you've beaten a game in? 

I'm pretty sure the game is Ys 1 and according to steam i spent 5 hours on it so yeah... it's a pretty short game so that makes sense.

13:A game you were the most excited for when it wasn't released yet? 

In the past: Ys Memories of Celceta, i was so excited for this game i actually bought a vita when it came out.

Currently: Trails in the Sky SC since it's been a long time coming and hopefully with it being translated ow we will get some other games from the Kiseki line... I'm okay with DL only titles if it means i get my fix. also I'm so excited to hear that the translator from recettear is working on it cause they did a wonderful job of that game. 

14:A game you think would be cool if it had voice acting? 

Pretty much every game that doesn't have voice acting would be that much more enjoyable with voice acting... i love voice acting (excluding crappy ones like L'ark rise fantasia) and yeah... i prefer when they give the option for language of VA (though 99% i pick english) so that if the english sucks i can switch it. 

15:Which two games do you think would make an awesome crossover? 

this could go either way but A tales of and Ys series cross over would make me smile from ear to ear... by it ys characters in a tales of setting or Tales of characters playing like an Ys game... both ideas make me grin from ear to ear. 

16:Character you've hated most? From what game?

Tidus from Final Fantasy 10 and Seraphim from Disgaea. 

Tidus cause he's just so unlikeable and the story continues to try and focus on him when it is (against everything he says)  in fact not his story but in actuality yuna's story... she should be the main character... but instead we get this annoying doofus playing the main character and yeah... just annoys me. 

Seraphim cause... well.... Spoilers: thanks to him i couldn't use my best character in the final fight : End spoilers.

17:What game do you never tell people you play?

I'm not really ashamed of any games i play... but i don't think people realise how much i play games like bejewled or the pokemon version of tetris attack  (pokemon puzzle league) so yeah... those i guess...

18:A game you wish your friends knew about? 

Back in the day i would have said Tales of games but those have grown in popularity so now I'll say Ys games cause Dammit i just enjoy them so much and i want my friends to enjoy them. 

19:Which game do you think deserves a revival? 

Ys 5 but knowing falcom I'm sure it's in the works... right after they release Ys 8

20:What was the first video game you ever played? 

According to family: Super Mario Bros/duck hunt when i was 2

According to my memory: Diddy Kong racing when i was 7 or 8.... but i believe my family on this... i just do not remember anything before 7. 

21:How old were you when you first played a video game?

Again i was a toddler apparently though i do not remember it... i remember i would watch my dad play games occasionally but i didn't start playing games by myself till 7 or 8 (i wanna say 8 cause i don't see how i could play games with a broken arm when i was 7... granted 2 months between breaking the arm and christmas so.... maybe? gah that time is too fuzzy for me)

22:If you could immerse yourself in any game for one day, which game would it be? What would you do? 

Ys Memories in celceta, go to the town where ancient lore plays, go to the spot where the relic is kept and just draw and hope that the music in the game is the ambient music in the town... it would just be so wonderful. 

23:Biggest disappointment you've had in gaming? 

Finding out i don't like zelda games... i know it sounds odd but i REALLY wanted to like Link to the past and realising that not only did i not have a good time with it but I've never had a good time with a zelda game was a bit... surprising. It was like i had been lying to myself in order to conform to this idea of what a gamer is and not enjoying one of the most beloved games out there made me wonder what am i not getting... why am i not connecting to this thing? I'm over it now cause honestly if not liking a super popular series makes me less of a gamer then  that's not a community i want to be a part of... i want to be part of an inclusive community that likes and dislikes all sorts of games and still gets along.

24:Casual, Hardcore, or in the middle?

Probably in the middle, it's hard cause i play really niche games no one talks about so some people have assumed I'm this hardcore jrpg fan and I'm not...  i play games for enjoyment above all else... and the best way to find games you enjoy is to try a bunch of games that you may not have heard of.

25:Be honest; have you ever used cheats (like ActionReplay or Gameshark)? 

No, i have one for the DS but i never ended up using it. 

26:Handheld or console? 

I actually prefer handhelds... i like that i can pause at any time by just putting it to sleep and that i can go anywhere and play for 5 mins or play for an hour... playing P4 on Handheld was way more enjoyable then it was on ps2.... i think consoles have their place though but if I'm not worried about graphics i would rather play a handheld version of a game then a console one. 

27:Has there ever been a moment that has made you cry? 

name a game with a sad scene in it and i promise you it has brought me to tears. 

the worst offenders are: 

Disgaea - Normal ending (and my preferred ending)

Tales of Phantasia - Truth about Dhaos

Persona 4 - Hospital scene

Ys MoC - Knowledge

Radiant Historia - True ending

Trails in the Sky - That cliffhanger

28:Which character's clothes do you wish you owned the most? 

Even though I'm a girl... I really love Adol's outfit in celceta and with no alterations (aside from getting it to fit) i would wear it... i adore his hoodie and the points his shirt go into... I am actually contemplating cosplaying it (as a female Adol)  just so i can have the hoodie and necklace and wear it to work and have no one be the wiser cause i ALWAYS wear hoodies.... and it would be one of the more normal looking ones.... so yeah... i mean there's also Elena's guard outfit from Oath/Alternative saga but that's just cause i love the scarf and the sword is pretty awesome too... though it would be tricky to make.

29:Which is more important, gameplay or story? 

Music....

okay in all honesty i don't know... i have forgiven games that play badly that have a great story and i have forgiven games that have a crappy story but are really fun to play.... but out of the two... i guess the edge has to go to gameplay cause if the controls stop me from having a good time i wont be enjoying the story.  But my original answer still stands... if the music is worth it i will forgive a lot.

30:A game that hasn't been localized in your country that you think should be localized?

*insert any Falcom game that hasn't been localized in any form* honestly... so many.... but yeah.... falcom games for sure... and also the tales games we haven't gotten... it would be nice to get those.

so yeah... that's it... i did the thing no one asked me to do... yay~